The wealth of nations, the [Social Trends Institute] report says, is inextricably associated with the health of families. And, amongst other factors, the global retreat from marriage and from family has depressed economic growth and has deeply hurt two generations of children.
“Evidence drawn from Europe and North America indicates that children who are raised in an intact married home are more likely to excel in school and be active in the labour force as young adults,” the report says. “An abundant social-science literature, as well as common sense, supports the claim that children are more likely to flourish, and to become productive adults, when they are raised in stable, married-couple households.” Yet, with the global decline of these households, “the sustainability of humankind’s oldest organization, the family ”“ the fount of fertility, nurturance and human capital ”“ is now an open question.”
The report cites studies that indicate that American children who are raised outside of “an intact married home” are two to three times more likely to suffer serious social and psychological problems….
So they’re blaming the common people for the economic meltdown if they’re not married and having kids? LOL. Gee, it couldn’t have anything to do with real, economic issues such as companies not hiring and banks not lending, eh? And what sense would it make for the unemployed to marry and have kids in this mess? I can see it now — the bigwigs would be crowing about the irresponsibility of having children you couldn’t feed and relying on the rest of society to take care of them. And they’d actually be right.
But does anyone care about what these sorts of headlines do to kids who don’t have both parents for whatever reason? Does anyone stop to realize that there is at least one whole generation of these kids who has been labeled “at risk” and told by their teachers, counselors and society over and over again that they are likely to do drugs, go to prison, and not achieve? Having that drilled into one’s head can create a self-fulfilling prophecy for some and, most certainly, depression.
Two weeks after my son’s father died, a teacher at his RC school went on and on about this topic in class even though they knew about the death. He came home at the end of the day so sad that it broke my heart. And because of the loss of his father and the incessant repetition of articles and studies like this from the classroom, pulpit, and media, he has battled depression and feelings of worthlessness since adolescence.
Please stop it. I mean that. I have seen firsthand the harm that telling kids over and over that they’re “alarmingly at-risk” and the potential dregs of society causes, even to my own son with me to help and intervene. Now, imagine the kid whose mother has neither the means nor the education to adequately intervene. As a teacher, I took those kids under my wing but it still broke my heart to see the hurt in their eyes and to hear them say, when they failed something, that it didn’t matter anyway because everyone says they’ll probably wind up in prison.
You may think you’re talking around or above these kids but, guess what? You’re not. It hurts them. They’re getting the message over and over again and there is nothing they can do to change their family situation/composition. Sometimes, though, their mothers will marry the nearest available man to “give the kids a father” and this man is anything BUT a good influence. Please stop.
Infuse these kids with confidence, self-worth, and determination, instead. Tell them that even if society casts stones at them, Jesus and His Church love them all the same. Make them feel wanted and needed. If Christians don’t, other groups on the margins will. Guaranteed.